The jailer
by ITILY
Summary: Mello's been put in jail where he meets a certain kind-hearted jailer...Can this jailer give Mello the redemption he needs before he faces execution?..AU...Werewolf MelloX Near...a little angsty...Please R&R Complete!
1. prologue

Mello's POV

The darkness creeps in on me from every corner, swallowing and engulfing, it can be suffocating at times, too much to bear, to hold down this thing inside of me, to keep my control. I awoke finding the familiar sight of steel bars, I was kept behind them of course, locked up and put away, I wonder what I'm in for this time or what's my punishment, how severe it was, who were my victims, is there any redemption?

Two lights shone at the end of the hallway, and footsteps made their way towards me. I hear nothing else, I must be kept in isolation, I suppose I don't even have the pleasure of the company of other criminals. I curled myself up on the dirty ground, my head on my knees so that I would not need to face whoever was coming or why they were coming.

A few moments later, the footsteps stopped, the light was much brighter and filled the cell I was trapped in, I hid my face, afraid to let them see the monster hidden behind these blue eyes.

"This is it, prisoner one three five" prisoner one three five, how suiting that I did not even have the right to wear a name anymore.

"What's his name?" a soft and feminine voice spoke, was it a woman? No, my ears knew better than to assume that. I almost felt inclined to look, but my shame kept my face down.

"Don't know" the tone suggested that he didn't care. "He was found guilty of rape and murder." Rape? That's a first, did I really do that? I don't remember, but I suppose I shouldn't be too surprise, considering…

"Filthy scum, whatever, he'll hanged in four days time, doubt he still needs a name by then" I'll be hanged?

"Henry" the small voice retorted. Such a sweet timid voice, it shouldn't be in a place like this.

I heard a huff and a pair of footsteps leading away, a light guiding them, but the other stayed behind, whatever for?

"Mister, are you awake?" the sweet voice chimed. "Are you alright?" kindest poured on each word. This person, whoever it was, was too kind and sincere.

"Mister?"

"Speak." I managed to respond, never lifting my face.

"Are you cold Mister?"

"Why?"

"Your clothes are torn." Are they? Now that this person has spoke, I realize how chilly it felt to be in confinement.

"Yes, I am cold" I answered simply, expecting the person to go away after he was satisfied with his questions, no one would really care for a lowlife. True enough, I heard footsteps moving away after awhile, they were quite fast though, was he running?

The footsteps lead away, and soon enough I was left in silence and solitude again. Alone with my thought and prayer.

'Lord, forgive me for I have sinned, I have sinned a lot'

"Mister!" I was caught by surprise. This time I brought my face up, no point hiding forever. I was stunned by what I saw, for a moment I thought I was staring at an angel of God. However, an angel wouldn't have been panting to catch his breath or have tiny droplets of sweat on their forehead and they would definitely not bother with someone like myself.

"Here Mister, put this on, it will help keep you warm." the small mass of white spoke to me, smiling ever so slightly, too shy. "Take it." He slid them on the bars. Slowly, I stood myself up, though not perfectly upright, and made my hesitant steps towards the bars. The little boy made no move to step away, instead he looked at me intently. I wonder what did I look like, not a pretty sight I would guess.

"Thank you" I stood, taking the clothes in my hands, only the bars separated us now, the distance only a mere one foot, I could've easily reached out, strangle him and took the keys that hung idly on his waist. But those eyes stared deep into mine, searching, and his smile never wavering, and the way his pallor skin glowed, too innocent.

"You're welcome" too polite.

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Feeling swoon lately...decided to write to let off some steam....the medications seriously taking a toll on me...hope it'll go away soon...anyways hope you guys like this...please REVIEW!


	2. Have mercy on your lost child

whoa...unintentionally saw hentai yesterday...and it was like..eeewwww...sorry but I think I'll stick to yaoi...hehe....yea...so I'm clearing my system of the unpleasant sight with this...enjoy and please REVIEW!!

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**Have Mercy on your lost child**

I sighed heavily, trying to get comfortable in the worn out bed which I could feel every spring vertically pushing against my bones, after awhile, I gave in, sitting up instead. My palm went to my face, pressing slightly on my left eyes. The drowsiness did not leave but my senses were increasing, this was always how I felt, conscious in my subconscious and alert in drowse. I breathed in deeply, smelling the humid-air, it was going to rain, another thunderstorm perhaps. I smell a lot of water. This was a good sign, perhaps God gives me mercy finally at my last hours, I would like to die peacefully, no worries of ever becoming that monster I was again.

My eyes darted around the enclosure, taking in every ugly dirty detail, until I was facing the bars that stood tauntingly rigid in front of me. I was trapped.

'Lord, loving and heavenly father, have mercy on me, your lost child'

I was about to pray with the rosary when I realize I no longer had it around my neck. "Great" I muttered under my breath, feeling worst than ever, an awkward feeling balled up at the back of my throat, I felt like I was going to break. Wiping away the small tears that haven't manage to shed, I sighed and stared at the bars blankly. Taking notice of a small mass of white laying against it on the ground. What was this kid doing?

Without much thinking, I walked over, going on my knees to get a better look. I couldn't quite see his face, but his breathing attested that he was asleep. Should I wake him? "Hey, wake up" No respond. I tried poking his shoulder, he merely grunted and continued his sleep.

I blinked, not really sure what to do next. I didn't want him to lose his job for slacking off, but he seemed to like doing that a lot, especially with him coming to my cell practically every hour and staying for as long as possible, ranting on and on about his life since I never answer all those other questions which he directed at me, so instead he went on and answered it himself. Despite his annoying and relentless jabbering, I was quite fond of him, I mean his company, though I wasn't sure why he even bothered with me.

Sighing once again, I slid down the bars, now leaning against them, back to back with the little boy, feeling the awkward blend of coldness from the iron and heat emitting from the small body. The wan moonlight disappearing behind the dark clouds along with the stars, leaving nothing but a veil of black on everything. It began to drizzle, even the sound was starting to sooth me, knowing I didn't have to face my fears, not in these conditions. I relaxed myself, unable to fall asleep being the nocturnal nature. My mind wandered to nothing significant, thinking about the two days I've been kept in the cell, about some of my lost memories and some that weren't lost, I shuddered a little, quickly distracting my mind with something else.

Near…That's what the jailer calls himself, even though it's not his real name. He said he works here because of his father. I remember him telling me that his father was a bad person and one day all his bad deeds caught up with him, and he was given the death sentence. He didn't want his father to be alone in his final days so this Near applied to work here as a guard. He knew he couldn't give his father redemption but perhaps a little closure was enough, or so that was what he said. He doesn't really have anyone else, so he kept the job after his father was put to death, which I couldn't comprehend why he would do something like that, it didn't seem fitting or rational.

I shook my head, smiling inwardly as I realized how much I've come to know of the small child in the short time. Near… what else do I know about him? I know he's not as young as he seemed, he's actually twenty-three, but I refuse to refer him to anything else short of 'little boy'. His favorite color was white, he liked eating bread, his pet cat died two weeks ago in which he cried three days over. I let out a humored breath, rolling my eyes as I continued my train of thoughts. Near doesn't like Henry, the other guard. I don't blame him, I don't like Henry either, the pompous fool. He's afraid of the dark, and thunder and dirt and the ocean and getting sick and the cold weather and small cramped places (why is he working in this place again?)…and dogs….

The thunder clashed once, stopping the awful thought that was going to follow after. I sighed yet again, like an old man worn of age and weary, which I was in a sense.

'Hail Mary full of grace, the Lord is with you, blessed..'

"Mister" I wasn't surprised, although I hadn't expected him to awake so abruptly, interrupting me once again.

"Yes" I said simply, my voice was breathy and tired.

"Here, I think this belongs to you" I turned to look over my shoulder, seeing the little boy now facing me on his knees like a faithful servant, not something close to being appropriate at all. I ignored this, eyes focusing on his arm stretched out to me. In his hand laid beads laced into a necklace which was held together on its end with a centered cross.

I contemplated on whether or not I should reach out the bars and take it from his hands, would it be safe to do something of that sort? But he cut me short, reaching in instead, taking my hand and putting the rosary in it, then closing my fingers so that it wrapped them securely.

"I'm glad" He says, still holding my hand in both of his, smiling innocently, "That you still have faith." I was taken aback, to put it mildly. Slowly, I slid my hands out of his grasp and inside my cage once more, nodding slightly then placing the rosary around my neck where it once belonged.

"Thank you" The slight surprise was still present in my voice. I had wanted to ask where he had gotten it, but I rationalize that he was a worker here, so he was in charge of the prisoners possessions, maybe he stole it to give it back to me or something, he had done things like that for me in the short time that we've known each other, such as sneaking in food and clothes. Yes, it must be something of those sorts.

"You're welcome" He smiles, and it brightens everything with a radiant and pure glow. Strange child, really, but I didn't want to dwell on these matters, not that I had the luxury to. I needed penance and forgiveness, I needed salvation, closure, I needed it soon before death comes to claim me, I needed these things, I don't need a child.

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Sorry about the slow updates for these and even slower story progression....but I think that this story is somber so rushing it would ruin the thing...I'm still figuring out the ropes for this one...so it'll be slow...sorry...I kinda know what I want but I think it needs five chapters to reach that stage...anyways please REVIEW!!

P.S. Special apologies to Greenkittenkid4....I tried my best to make it long...XP


	3. Psalms and Protection

I'm so upset and hurt...somebody said he/she was gonna report me...does that mean I won't be able to write anymore?...I cried like the whole night and in the whole morning...I couldn't figure out what to do after that...I know it's cheesy but I thought my heart was breaking or something like that...I'm still sad until now...like what am I gonna do?

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**Psalms and Protection**

"Mister, are you awake?" the words barely above a whisper. I rumbled, slowly lifting my heavy eyelids and sitting up on the creaky bed. I raised my arms, stretching and yawned, becoming conscious quickly. My eyes shot to the bars again, where the light was shining the cell. The jailer stood peering through the bars, it seemed that he was going to try to fit his head through them just to get a better look at me. The thought was amusing enough to make a small smile grace my face. Pressing a palm on my right eye, I shook my head slightly, the smile disappearing as abruptly as it surfaced. I felt strange this night, my head, it felt light and dizzy, to put it simply.

I turned to view the weather outside through the small square of a window. Dark and dim, good, although I would have preferred some rain and more clouds.

"Good evening" the familiar quiet voice was even quieter today, if that was possible, "I've brought you dinner." Nodding once in acknowledgement, I stood up slowly, heading towards the bars. "Thanks" I breathed, taking the plate of rice and potatoes, and also the cup of water. I sat down close to the bars, and hastily stuffed the food down my throat since I'm asleep throughout the day, I only take one meal. The food wasn't exactly very tasty I must admit, and what I would do for some meat, but who am I to complain. I cleaned my plate and emptied the cup of water, wiping my mouth with my sleeve.

Taking a relief breath, I shuffled and made myself comfortable on the dirty ground, waiting for the jailer to start rambling soon after as he usually did. After a long pause of nothing but silence, I finally pulled my face up. The small white boy sat horizontally in front of me, his knees bent in a very lady-like manner, staring at the dust blankly as if lost in some alternate universe. I cleared my mind and tried to use my senses to understand his emotions at the moment, they were a bunch of mixed up feelings, confusion, sadness and even fear, but that was all I could get out of him. It felt like he wanted to cry for some reason.

I opened my eyes, not wanting to pry anymore into his personal space, surprised to meet two deep grey eyes staring back at me. I instantly looked the other way, breaking the eye contact, not liking to see straight into another's eyes, it just made me feel difficult and on edge. "I'm done" I said flatly.

"That was fast. Did you have enough?" 'Hardly' I wanted to say, but decided against it and simply gave a small nod. This would be his cue to start prattling, but again, he fell silent, sinking into his own form of solitude. And as for myself, strange as it was, I was actually getting worried over this kid.

"Are you alright?" I couldn't keep this silence, especially with all the emotions I was reading off him. "Yes, I'm fine" A weak smile forms on his pale lips, obviously not a happy one. I sighed, incapable of doing much.

"Answer when I call, O God, my justice. When I was in distress, you gave me solace. Have compassion on me and hear my plea." I said the evening prayer, both for the jailer's behalf and myself.

"Can you tell me about God?" I was interrupted. I blinked at the sudden question, he had never asked me something like that before, nor has anyone else for that matter. God? How can I explain someone, something like that? God was so many things, so many words, so many persons, he was the most abstract thing in the course of humanity, God was everything, God _is_ everything. I've read much about Him in the scriptures throughout my years and of what people spoke of Him. He was the person I had turned to in my greatest times of need and had not reached out, I chased to be under His holy light and was rejected, I was turned down many a times, and yet I kept coming back to Him. He made me be born a monster, a killer, an outcast and a runaway, but I would go as far as the ends of worlds to seek him out. One might say that my faith was foolish, blind, because for all I believed…

"I don't know"

Another thick silence fell, swallowing the entire atmosphere.

"Mello" I spoke out randomly. The jailer made a small inquiring sound, leaning in closer to the bars, head slightly tilted to the side. "My name is Mello." I repeated.

"Mello?" Things were lightening up already. "Mello!" I don't think I've ever seen someone grinned so wide before. "Mello, it's so nice to meet you." The jailer spoke after he had seemed to collect some of his composure, "So where's your hometown? I've been a resident here all my life, you know, never really got a chance to travel. I bet you're an adventurer, you've probably traveled all round the world. Have you ever been on a ship? I've never been on a ship, but I really want to" I smiled inwardly. The way he speaks to me, sometimes I think he doesn't remember where I am or what I am, and for a moment, sometimes I forget as well, and the bars that separate us doesn't exist.

'Lord, I put my trust in your unfailing love, my heart rejoices in your redeeming grace. I will sing to Yahweh, for He has been good to me'

"The priest will come tomorrow night" His words cut my trail of thoughts, "and the execution will proceed at dawn the next day"

"I see" Is that why he was feeling those things before? Slowly, I faced him, seeing his dark eyes practically a wall of black, and the sorrow they held. Why did he care so much?

Carefully, I reached out the steel rods, my calloused hands laid gently on his hair, running my fingers through his unbelievably soft curls. "You didn't-" I paused, realizing my hands was on his cheek, and how his eyes were glassy, "They're wrong. You didn't do those things, I know you didn't" His voice became like those of a child. "You're not a murderer" he whispers softly.

"You don't know me" I am a murderer, no worst, I'm a monster.

His pale lips parted to speak when someone said loudly, almost shouting, "What are you doing?" I retracted my hand, turning to see who it was.

"Henry" Near said, his voice uneasy.

"Near, what were you doing just then?" The brunette took an intimidating step forward. I found myself glaring dangerously at the newcomer. "We were just talking" The pale child got up slowly, dusting his clothes.

Henry seemed a little shock with his hazel eyes widening a moment before narrowing them, "You know we're not suppose to associate with the prisoners" Near stared at the other guard, his eyes blank, not wanting to give anything away that could make the whole situation get any more compromising. I remained silent, merely observing from the sidelines, but not liking what I was seeing.

The brunette stepped closer and pulled Near to the side, away from my cell to the one opposite of mine which was empty, whispering something to the child. As if I wouldn't hear just because he was now a little over five feet away, even if they were all across the other side of the hallway, I would still hear. "You rejected my offer, but here you are getting intimate with a murderer of all people" Each whispered word was clearer than a scream on top of a mountain. "Do you know the punishment for such misconduct?" An aggravating smirked form on the brunette's lips. It was an absolute blood boil watching those disgusting fingers danced up and down Near's arm in a circular motion.

All of my limbs started to hurt, shaking with rage, my knuckles turning white as they gripped the bars harder. I could almost taste some blood in my mouth, perhaps from biting my tongue or lips, my teeth clenched tightly until my jaw started to ache.

"The question is, what are you going to do for me to keep quiet?" It doesn't take much smarts to hear the implications behind those words.

I was going to say something, but then the two turned to face me with a shock look on their faces. I wonder what I looked like? Did blood and saliva dangle off my lips, did my eyes reflect my murderous intentions? Could they sense the monstrous predator I was becoming? Some low noise like a growl echoed throughout the place, I realized afterwards that it was coming from me. The ground beneath me started to shake as I clutched tighter to the bars, suddenly the steel didn't feel as strong or as rigid, I knew I could have brought them down and escaped.

The only thoughts running through my head at the moment was how I wanted to bite the fool's throat out and break that head off his shoulders for even thinking Near in that way. My vision started to go red as louder growls were emitted.

'Touch him again and you're finished' I warned mentally since it was obvious I've lost the capacity to speak. That expression on his face showed that he got the message and the brunette knew as well as I that these bars will do nothing to hold me back if he didn't do as told.

"Well, d-don't let me catching you doing that again" I glowered at the man until he walked away, noting how his heart beat rapidly in fear, good.

"Mello?" I snapped my attention back at the sound of Near's sweet voice. He was already standing at the bars, trying to reach in to me, his eyes fearful and worried. My feet moved on their own account, creeping my way back into the darkest part on the cell where I could cause the least harm.

"Are you alright?" I didn't answer, my voice had left me completely. As I detached myself from the treacherous moonlight, some of my rationality returning and the world wasn't a blur of red where I would inhale the smell of Near's body that made my mouth water. The jailer slid down the bars, on his knees now, the moonlight which invaded the small space through the square on the wall never leaving his porcelain face.

"You're not hurt, are you?" My eyes met his weakly, he was shaking and eyes watery. Care and concern, he was pushing many affectionate emotions for me, almost like he was afraid for me and not of me. Something I cannot come close to understanding its reasons.

"Please, Mello" The whisper went straight to my soul. Carefully, I moved towards the bars on my hands and the balls of my feet, a very animalistic manner until I was just a step from getting under the light again. "It's alright" Near said in a soothing voice, and somehow I trusted him. 'I'm sorry' I wanted to say, especially for scaring him and causing him trouble in the first place, but it just came out as weak whines, such as what a newborn pup would make.

Hesitantly I step closer until the tip of his fingers touched my golden locks. "Don't be afraid, I won't hurt you" I was truly taken aback by those words, those were the things I was suppose to say to him and not the other way around. But I nodded nonetheless and moved forward until I was in his reach then allowed myself to collapse, feeling all my strength drained out and seep into the soil.

I've never felt so vulnerable and exposed, sleeping right under the bright sun of the night, and yet keeping so much of myself under control. It must've been the smooth hands that gently caress my face and stroke my hair almost lovingly and his voice singing me to sleep. I knew I was protected from everything else and with this, I wasn't going to hurt anyone anymore, I was less of a beast and more of a human.

Thank you.

"You're welcome" I imagined him saying and fell into a peaceful slumber.

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Sorry if this wasn't up to standard...but it's hard to write well when I feel like dirt...I'm really sorry...


	4. Dear God

Alright...as I said before I wasn't reported (yet)...it was just a warning...so don't worry about it...

Anyways I've decided that I'm going to focus on this story and finish this one first, cuz jumping between stories is getting confusing...Or would you guys like me to finish another story first?

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**Dear God**

I hate this body, really I do. It has betrayed me on countless occasions, and now it will add another to its record.

When I finally woke up, sunset was already more than over, which meant that I had wasted yet another day sleeping. Even though I had expected this, I was still displeased that half of my last day on earth was spent in slumber, something I was going to do a lot of after this.

"Good evening" That greeting alone helped lift up my spirits. "Dinner is served," Near says in an almost humored manner. "Good evening," I smiled back, taking the plate and cup. The white child seems taken aback by this, but the shock was quickly replaced by a wide grin.

I cleaned off every last scrap of food and gulped down every last drop of water, eating a little slower than what I normally would, savoring the taste, it was my last meal after all. After that, I spent about an hour talking to the jailer, although he did most of the talking, while I just listened and tried to be responsive, there was no point being a glum with the only person who had ever showed me kindest on my last day, or more like night.

The priest arrived shortly after our conversation had come to a point where there was nothing left to say. I had requested that the father did not enter my cell, since I felt myself too dangerous without the bars as a boundary, the priest was all but too willing. I said my confessions, and the father gave me the Sacrament of Anointment. To be frank, the entire session went very cold for me and felt forced, like a program, and void for me. But I suppose I did felt more at ease and somehow am able to accept my fate with more dignity.

'Dear God, stay with me' That's all I hoped for, I know that the fires of hell awaits me, and I would suffer forever and ever, never able to experience paradise, but please, dear Lord, stay with me, I need you.

Everything was quiet after the holy man had left me in solitude once again. Fear, that's all I could fathom at the moment. Fear, fear, fear, fear, there was no escaping it, it made me weak, I couldn't move. Tears began to well up at the corners of my eyes, I turned to face the moonlight, my foe, in all its beauty, full bloomed and bright, at least in hell, it wouldn't haunt me anymore. My body started to shiver until I couldn't hold myself up, I sat on the ground, leaning against the bars for support. A spur thought ran through my head.

I wanted to lose control right then, to let the monster take hold of me, break out, take me away from here, for I was so afraid. The circumstances of it was in favor of me, I could do it, I could do it now, and I wouldn't, wouldn't have to die.

'But you deserve to die' I raised my head abruptly, staring at the little boy with wide-eyes.

'You should die' A lady appears in the cell, her hair askew, her red dress torn.

'Go to hell,' A man with a riffle says.

Die, die, die, die, die, die, die…They kept repeating, more and more of them, filling up the small, cramped cell. I can't take it anymore. Please stop. But they kept adding, some of them, I don't even remember their faces, some torn so badly, they don't even have a face. They kept chanting, wishing for my death as I curled myself tighter and tighter, hoping I could just disappear from reality all together.

'Please dear God!'

"Mello! What's wrong?" A warm hand placed itself on my shoulder. Shakily, I brought my face up, tears running like rain down my cheeks. "What's wrong? Are you alright? I should get the doctor" the petite child says, full of worry.

"No!" I shouted, quickly grabbing his wrist as he stands up. "Please don't leave me" I pleaded, the tears violently shedding.

"Shh, it's alright" He says soothingly, stroking my hair and sitting on the ground with me. "I'm so scared" My voice trembled, I felt like a helpless little child without a mother. "I don't want to die" I cried, clutching the jailer closer to me through the bars, begging him. "I don't want to burn!"

"Shh," Near hushed, his cool hand still stroking through my locks.

"Please" I whispered, all my strength gone, "I don't want to be alone" I'm so alone, please help me. God, help me.

"I won't leave you, I promise" Even though I knew that was lie, and even if it wasn't, such a promise cannot be realized for me, but eventually that calmed me. My loud cries, turned into mournful quiet sobs and pained whimpers.

My eyelids grew heavy and I was almost dozing off into sleep, when Near got up suddenly. There was some metallic sounds, then the door flung open.

"What are you doing?" Shock took over me, and I jumped up, stepping away.

"Shh, keep your voice down" He whispers and placed a finger on his lips. "Come on Mello," He extends his hand to me, "There's no time to waste, you have to go now!" Near urges me. I stood there agape, too confused to do anything. Near furrows his brow and takes my wrist, yanking me out of the cell and we started running down the hallways.

My mind snapped and I stopped dead in my tracks, "This is wrong" I managed. Near blinks his dark silvery eyes. Out of the blue, he closes our distance and pull me down for a kiss. All reasoning flew out the window when I felt his soft lips, sweet as honey on mine.

"Come on!" He says urgently and tugs me along, our steps increasing with pace. Sirens rang and red lights blinked around the scene, but by that time, we were already pushing the door open and running.

The moonlight blinded me, gushing its light all over, and opening the path for the beast. All I remembered after that was a bliss of white, although everything had became indubitably vivid, my mind was plain and empty. Therefore, all that came to me, was the feel of the strong wind in my fur and the soil digging in my nails and a soft distant voice murmuring…

"You're welcome"

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Some curious questions : Which country do you think I come from?

: Do you guys prefer AU over non-AU?

REVIEW!!


	5. Damned

**=Flashback

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**Damned**

**Near's POV**

I knew it was a long shot, but I had to try, if I hadn't done it, I would never find peace, although with the matter at hand, peace was the least of my concerns.

The skies were poured with a tint of orange and red as the sun began to set. It won't be too long now. As a last request, they allowed the my punishment to take place at the first sight of the evening star and in the prison premises. Some of the prisoners were led out to eyewitness the execution.

The headsman stood on my right with his arms crossed at his chest, the axe sharpened and ready to be put to good use very soon. Cold sweat matted my forehead, I tried to wipe them, only to be reminded of how my hands were secured behind me. More time passes mercilessly, the small crowd is growing impatiently, some of the prisoners chatting away. The fragility of my current situation and my slim chances is sinking in like heavy pounds of a hammer.

Is this what father felt when he was up on the platform, his neck resting on this icy cold slab? This fear, so immense, there are no words to describe it, only my body tells, with its shaking, trembling, sweating and the stinging tears. I knew I was the one who brought this on myself, but I had planned this perfectly. Had I made a fatal mistake somewhere? Was I too expectant?

Silence swept across as the evening star sparkled in the sky of blue and purple, along with it, the gentle moonlight. Somewhere far away, someone must be laughing at the irony. How can something so minuscule, a mere dot of white in the whole vastness of the sky, in all its romance, and yet, it leads to nothing but a dissatisfactory death.

My heart races, as they put the black cloth over my head, taking away my view of the heavy ever steady prison gates which lay closed almost always, unless to bring in a convict of some kind. Even at that moment, where the fear was so wonderfully gruesome, it would never cover the hate and anger I harbor. It's not fair, for my father, my mother, no one had any pity for them, and no one will have pity for me.

They say that people who die with hate get sent straight to hell, if that is so, I hope that when I get there, I won't have to wait too long to see _him_ again.

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"Guilty"

I could not decipher how the jury decided on their verdict. How could a man, kind and gentle, murder, no slaughter his dutiful and ever loyal wife? It made no sense and no lawyer will ever be able to defend what they had done with their call.

My father, he was but a simple farmer, trying to get by, he worked hard, he loved and cared for us, he did everything to keep us happy. But alas, he was not an intelligent man, he could not pick up the scent of danger lurking into his home, he could not recognize _that man's _intentions, could not identify the advances _he_ made, until it was too late.

So when they brought my father to court, the broken man he was, he fell silent. Silence equals guilty, that must have been what they decided upon. Of course, it had to be my father. How could it be the nobleman? How could something so unreasonably ugly, done to such a lovely lady, how could it be the man in the suit? Of course, it had to be the farmer, and his tools, his pitchfork.

My mother, another simple farmer, an ordinary, no lower than that, a peasant. What could a nobleman want with her? My mother, who despite all the hard labor, was blessed with the unusual beauty of an aristocrat, a queen even.

Her fair hair and fairer skin, her lively eyes, her lips. Her petite frame. Her honey voice. Her contented smile. Her blood, splattered across the yard, pooling underneath her motionless corpse. Her discombobulated screams turning into weeping silence. Her bones disjointed, distorted. Her skin skinned, and decorated with black, blue, read, green. Her slender fingers, one in the bedroom, one at the door, one in the grass, one choked down her throat, one in my hands. Her dead, empty eyes staring back at me. Her pleasant living and her explicit death. Her everything, her nothing.

* * *

**

He took everything from me, my father, my mother, my home and my sanity, there is only one thing left, vengeance.

"Catch me if you can," He dares me, and gives a smile, eyes igniting a red, and black piercing out of his pallid skin. _Monster._

* * *

"MONSTER!" Someone shouts.

"Kill it! KILL IT!!"

* * *

**

There was no hope left, I couldn't catch him. He was too fast, too far.

I lay flat on the grass, heaving and panting. Burning tears rolling down my cheeks. I'm sorry, father, mother, I couldn't do it.

And then I heard it.

Howling.

* * *

The cloth was tugged off my head roughly, I blinked a few times, clearing the blurry images. Gold was everywhere. It was huge, or maybe I just haven't been this close before. Tentatively, I reached a hand up to stroke the fur out of its eye, those blue, I'd know them anywhere, even on a seven foot demon dog. It made no move, no sound, just gazing down on me, searching for something, but he won't ever find what he's looking for, the truth.

I rolled over, my tied up hands getting painful. Another tough tug, and the ropes where off. I place my back against the grass again, it still stood four paws over me, seeming lost and confuse.

Then it began to shake its fur and I watched as all the gold started floating off its body, up into the sky and slowly vanishing with sparks like stardust. If it was anyone else, they would have been awed at the sight, but not me.

"Are you alright?" I nodded, faking a smile.

It's almost too easy, lying, cheating, after everything I've been through. I don't care what I have to risk, to lose. I don't care how low I sink. I don't care about falling, as long as I drag _him_ down with me.

* * *

"I love you," I said with a smile, leaning forward for a kiss. He tensed, trying to break away, but I held a strong grip on his arms. Deepening the kiss, he finally returned it and ease into the feeling. Quickly working my fingers down the buttons, I slipped my shirt off.

The blonde seemed to snapped at this, and pulled away abruptly, this time I didn't manage to grab him. "I-I can't" He muttered, body shaking.

"I trust you" I lied naturally, moving over to straddle him. For a moment, I almost felt sorry for the poor guy. But it had to be done, intimacy was the only way for this to work, that's why my mother was killed right after and why I was never touched. It wasn't like Mello was such a good and honorable man anyway, although it was me who fake those charges against him, I'm sure that he has done things in his past that deserves some sort of chastisement.

Despite some protest, I knew he'd give in. I felt repulsed at myself when he penetrated me, but I forced myself to moan and call his name nonetheless. As a farmer's son, I didn't really have the chance, but if I did, I'd probably make a fine actor.

"Near!" He called and I felt the strange sensation of his orgasm in me, our seeds all over each other. I have to applaud myself, in spite of being a virgin, I think I did pretty well.

Mello fell asleep after that, for which I am grateful of. Now it's time to see if it works. Not really knowing what to do, I stared up at the moon in the dawning sky, focusing on my breathing and just trying to somehow connect with the light.

After a long time, disappointment and failure starts presenting itself. I sighed, noting that it came out a lot louder. Slowly, I opened my eyes, and it felt like I could see _everything_. The smell, the sounds, everything so fantastically vivid. I looked down, realizing I was already on all fours, although it felt like I was still on two. The pristine white fur all over was a dead giveaway.

I smiled. _Finally._

"Near" I turned abruptly, the blonde rolled to his side, snoring a little, probably dreaming of us together.

'I'm sorry, but thank you' I said inwardly to him. Frankly, I really did felt something for him, damn me if he must, but it had to be done, for my father, my mother, for myself.

Goodbye.

* * *

I know some people might want to kill me right now for leaving the story like this...but I'm running off to college soon...so XP...There should be a sequal after this...but I don't have the time to write it...you guys can just imagine how Mello and Near finally gets together....I'm truly sorry....don't hate me...XP....I promise to continue this when I can...pinky swear...


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